I couldn't get this world
Yesterday I had an IM conversation with John. He sent me a link to the website The Onion, "It's satiric and funny." "Good." I alway enjoy reading these styles, so I thought I would like it with 100 percent certainty. " But it's kinda difficult, too many cultural things,you may be not ready yet..." John said. "Why not ?", at that moment, I didn't know what he was talking about, and I was still SURE that I could understand any English websites without big problems. And then I was there, the Front Page of The Onion. I looked through it, for the first 30 seconds, I didn't find anything funny, " What it's so funny? Where are they?" I was curious. "You have to be patient, and some are difficult." John said. Keeping stubborn and impatient, I asked John to pick some news that he thought I might understand. I got two VERY FUNNY picks from him soon. One is "Child Abuse: How Much Is Too Much?" ( picture news, in the right of front page). The other is "Hand - Transplant Surgery". Starting with that picture, I kept staring at it for more than 2 minutes, but didn't get anything. Then I tried to read that news, but ended up the same --I was totally lost even though knew every single words there. I began to doubt my intelligence and reading skills , so I asked John for help. After his patient explaination, finally, I got them. I got them ,finally, and I started to realise the meaning of "cultural" and " not ready yet". Yes, John is exactly right, I'm not ready yet, I'll probably never be ready if I'm staying here for the rest of my life. The problem it's not the language itself , but the humours of The Onion lying behind the words that I cannot detect at all. That's because I have little knowledge of American culture and society. All I've known is just a little bit , but I can't really get into that culture and humour.
It reminds me of some other things. Comparing to normal Chinese , I'm a pretty "expert" on music and movies. But I'm not that good , not at all. Though I love them, what I've known is still a fraction, I wasn't grown up with these music and movies, and my degree of understanding them is far from fully appreciation.
Internet enables us to communicate with people all over the entire globe. I chat online sometimes.From Internet, I can hit it off with a stranger living another corner of the world in few minutes. But eventually, the conversations will wind up running out of topics. When people first meet, we are always curious about each other . Later, the chatting will be becoming harder and harder as we've already discussed some common topics. It's not easy to close to someone without fully touching his/her culture or life.I'm a bad talker who is struggling for squeezing the words, and I just feel they don't care about or intersted in who I am at all. They probably get bored by my ignorance of their culture. Chatting with strangers is passing time, chatting with strangers is wasting time.
I couldn't get the world, but at least I can get China, thinking in this way makes me feel better. But no, it's NOT ture -- I couldn't do that either.
Another story happened the same day. I got a book " Dictionary of Mordern chinese Slang" from Ryan last week, what I need to do is to pick the useful Chinese word I know, easy job. When I looked through the book for the first time, I found I only know 30 percent words there, I couldn't help laughting at the one who wrote that book," What a geek, he's listing so many unknown and useless words that Chinese couldn't understand. But soon I reaslised I was wrong, and the real geek is me. I took this book to last morning's class, there were 3 guys sitting in front of me who happened to be from Beijing. I handed the book to them, to my surprise, they knew most slangs on that book, and they all liked that book . " How could such things happen, are you sure you know these words?!" I asked them. " Of course, they're used a lot in northern China. Everyone there knows these words." " Nothern China. " No wonder I don't know. I've never stayed in the north and I don't have any friends from there.I have little knowledge about that part of China, stupid. I am chinese, but I cannot understand Chinese (zhong wen), I feel sort of bad about it. What's worse, the language is not the only problem of mine, I don't have enough knowlege towards many other things as well : classic novels, Chinese pop muisc, TV shows, traditional values...Though I don't regret the time I've been spending on somewhere else, it's no good for living this society.
Then I turned out to be a freak, I don't really know much about China, and I don't know too much about the other cultures outside. I'm mixed with everything a little bit , ending up knownig nothing deeply.
I have hard time finding places I can fit in, and I just feel I don't belong to anywhere.I've met tons of nice people who I can make friends with,but few of them become my friends.I can't stand being with people who like what I dislike.I can't stand keeping the relationship with someone who can't share my feelings and interests.I can't stand hanging out with bunch of people, ending up in a Karaoke house or playing poker all day. (two most popular recreation in this town).
And I guess they can't stand me either, I am weird, impatient, shameless,untalanted,self-righteous,imuture,abrupt...in other words, I'm not a nice person.I don't want to argue with that,it always takes time to get to know the inner self of someone, plus I don't have any self-conscious and don't care what others think of me .But only one thing I want to say is I'm not aloof , exclusive or anthing like that.I need friends, and I believe I can be a pretty good friend of someone I want to be with. However, I haven't met they yet, and they haven't found we either, this world is too big to get true friends.I'm still alone, and pretty content myself with my own world.
......
My computer died on me !
Now I'm at a Internet cafe to finish the left parts. The loudspeaker here is playing TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE music, I'm in hell. My computer couldn't boot; I know nothing about how to fix it. I made phone calls to the computer company, after 1 hours and 13 minutes constant dialing, they picked up my phone call and promised to come some other time, but not sure when . Since I don't expect on their efficiency, I figure I cannot come back in a short time, hope it will be fixed soon.
It reminds me of some other things. Comparing to normal Chinese , I'm a pretty "expert" on music and movies. But I'm not that good , not at all. Though I love them, what I've known is still a fraction, I wasn't grown up with these music and movies, and my degree of understanding them is far from fully appreciation.
Internet enables us to communicate with people all over the entire globe. I chat online sometimes.From Internet, I can hit it off with a stranger living another corner of the world in few minutes. But eventually, the conversations will wind up running out of topics. When people first meet, we are always curious about each other . Later, the chatting will be becoming harder and harder as we've already discussed some common topics. It's not easy to close to someone without fully touching his/her culture or life.I'm a bad talker who is struggling for squeezing the words, and I just feel they don't care about or intersted in who I am at all. They probably get bored by my ignorance of their culture. Chatting with strangers is passing time, chatting with strangers is wasting time.
I couldn't get the world, but at least I can get China, thinking in this way makes me feel better. But no, it's NOT ture -- I couldn't do that either.
Another story happened the same day. I got a book " Dictionary of Mordern chinese Slang" from Ryan last week, what I need to do is to pick the useful Chinese word I know, easy job. When I looked through the book for the first time, I found I only know 30 percent words there, I couldn't help laughting at the one who wrote that book," What a geek, he's listing so many unknown and useless words that Chinese couldn't understand. But soon I reaslised I was wrong, and the real geek is me. I took this book to last morning's class, there were 3 guys sitting in front of me who happened to be from Beijing. I handed the book to them, to my surprise, they knew most slangs on that book, and they all liked that book . " How could such things happen, are you sure you know these words?!" I asked them. " Of course, they're used a lot in northern China. Everyone there knows these words." " Nothern China. " No wonder I don't know. I've never stayed in the north and I don't have any friends from there.I have little knowledge about that part of China, stupid. I am chinese, but I cannot understand Chinese (zhong wen), I feel sort of bad about it. What's worse, the language is not the only problem of mine, I don't have enough knowlege towards many other things as well : classic novels, Chinese pop muisc, TV shows, traditional values...Though I don't regret the time I've been spending on somewhere else, it's no good for living this society.
Then I turned out to be a freak, I don't really know much about China, and I don't know too much about the other cultures outside. I'm mixed with everything a little bit , ending up knownig nothing deeply.
I have hard time finding places I can fit in, and I just feel I don't belong to anywhere.I've met tons of nice people who I can make friends with,but few of them become my friends.I can't stand being with people who like what I dislike.I can't stand keeping the relationship with someone who can't share my feelings and interests.I can't stand hanging out with bunch of people, ending up in a Karaoke house or playing poker all day. (two most popular recreation in this town).
And I guess they can't stand me either, I am weird, impatient, shameless,untalanted,self-righteous,imuture,abrupt...in other words, I'm not a nice person.I don't want to argue with that,it always takes time to get to know the inner self of someone, plus I don't have any self-conscious and don't care what others think of me .But only one thing I want to say is I'm not aloof , exclusive or anthing like that.I need friends, and I believe I can be a pretty good friend of someone I want to be with. However, I haven't met they yet, and they haven't found we either, this world is too big to get true friends.I'm still alone, and pretty content myself with my own world.
......
My computer died on me !
Now I'm at a Internet cafe to finish the left parts. The loudspeaker here is playing TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE music, I'm in hell. My computer couldn't boot; I know nothing about how to fix it. I made phone calls to the computer company, after 1 hours and 13 minutes constant dialing, they picked up my phone call and promised to come some other time, but not sure when . Since I don't expect on their efficiency, I figure I cannot come back in a short time, hope it will be fixed soon.